The End.

It is near. And, I am happy. Things are wrapping up in my work-world. A date has been set for the launch, anxiety is dissipating and confidence returning, something about Mercury retrograde, perhaps.

So, what has changed in recent months, amidst all the silence of this digital forum?

Thirty-three days have passed since my last repression.

Two months and five days have passed since I last “updated.”

Periods of my life of abstinence, whatever I was abstaining from, have always served me well. The teetotalism of the Fresno Years, those few years without perversion, a childhood of understanding.

I’ve made peace with Jesus Christ, for, like, um, the umpteenth time during a truly religious experience. Need all I say be “Jesus Christ was an artist?” Perhaps the original conceptual artist. The man was a genius if nothing else, if history holds some truth of that period of time. How to discern what did occur and who’s version is honest and whether or not miracles did happen, who am I to judge? The stories of the past being retold in halls and hallows repeatedly are insignificant; the truth within us is what matters most. Truth sold is false.

Atheism has never since been stronger in my blood, either.

I began to read “The Fountainhead” by Ayn Rand. While on one of my recent aeroplane flights over the Orange Curtain it dawned on me of the irony in timing, beginning to embark on this novel as I prepare myself for moving to Chicago for a period of my life. There is happiness there, Chicago, and within the book. I know this. Much like I knew the truth that day in Buena Vista Park when it was Jesus and I having a discussion on Trust.

The happiness in Chicago, like the architecture, is a different one than in San Francisco. And, not one that invalidates how I feel about Baghdad by the Bay, a truly incredible place, the Rebirth of Atlantis and a City with a Pyramid. And schizos. And people who find Jesus in a Park.

But, truth is everywhere, and it is inside happiness, inside us, inside a park or at the beach. Truth is within Everything.

And, whether we choose to personify Truth, identify it in inorganic tangibles, or relegate it into the cosmos, ultimately Truth is Freedom. While the decision for some to personify Truth into a dead man of many years ago, branded and corporatized through untaxed, unregulated pavilions of worship does make me sad, it’s really no different than my phenomenon of experiencing Truth as I watch a David Lynch movie and calling him my God. Because really, David Lynch is God. But, so am I.

So, peace be to you, to quote my Catholic roots, and also with you. Why fight? Why bicker over who’s Truth is more Truthful? People aren’t so much concerned about who’s Truth is right, it’s more about someone else calling them wrong. Anyhow, I digress.

I’m back at peace, and it’s a nice place. This, without my meditation practice. But, that’s a whole other story.

The stars and the sun dance to your drum. It’s pandemonium.